I purchased Kelly Clarkson’s latest album yesterday (there are monthly quotas one must meet to retain his gay card). At first listen, I’m pretty pleased.

After spilling my gladware-full of seasoned ground turkey meat all over the sisal kitchen rug (the kitchen, by the way, isn’t the best place for a sisal rug), I decided my regular vacuum could serve as a Shop-Vac. As if I were vacuuming hair or random fallen Apple-Jacks, I used the hose/wand attachment to remove the moist, salty ground meat chunks. Afterwards, the clear plastic container resembled one of those ‘make your own sand creation’ kits from a cart in the mall… with the various layers of colors – an inch of plant dirt, a layer of haircut hair, miscellaneous dust and lint, and finally some brown, wet meat. Try to find that at The Discovery Store.

My Starbucks addiction is still going strong… thanks in part to the cloud of sun-sucking crap hovering over the city. Vanilla iced lattes are my sunshine in a cup. Granted, 3-4 dollars a day stings the wallet, but I further justify it by the hot guy with the bushy hair personalizing it by writing my name on it each day.

Sunshine and a hot guy askin’ for my name? Way worth 4 bucks. How awesome would it be if he wrote it in bubble letters, or those old-school, dot-letters.

Had a date this weekend. Kinda a last minute deal really. Met offline, had drinks, played pool and darts, blah, blah. We’re supposed to go to dinner Tuesday night. Ho hum.

At the gym last week, there was a guy – probably around 19-20 – new to working out, had a trainer showing him some things. Anyway… while he was doing some ab work with one of those giant balls (teehee), I overheard him eagerly boasting to the trainer about how he was the best balancer in high school. “Yep, out of about 40 guys, I always had the best balance.” I’m not sure what activity he was involved in that required these mad balancing skills, or how he knew he was the ‘best balancer’ out of 40 guys… but it cracked me up. “Good balancer” sounds like one of those qualities you point out about someone who isn’t all that attractive when you’re trying to fix them up with a friend. “Oh, yeah… you’ll like this guy… he has a good personality, has a really good job and is a great balancer! Best in his high school, actually.”

Don’t get me wrong, I wasn’t cool in high school or anything… I was president of our choir for a couple years. That was my only contribution. Like his balancing, that was important to me at the time, and I’m sure – actually I know I thought I was cool and it was more important than it was. So good for him for having something to be proud of, I guess.

Today begins my last week aboard the S.S. Suck. I’ll probably get caught up on paying some bills, burning some CDs and online window shopping with my new paycheck in mind.